Sunday, January 20, 2008

Volume 14.

Yet more stuff that should be in the dictionary but isn’t.

Previous installments of the Blog d’Elisson Dictionary may be found in the Archives: Volume 1, Volume 2, Volume 3, Volume 4, Volume 5, Volume 6, Volume 7, Volume 8, Volume 9, Volume 10, Volume 11, Volume 12, and Volume 13.

decrapitation [de-cra-pi-tei-shun] (n) - The act of Beheading the Turtle: cutting off the tip of an emerging turd by applying pressure with the anal sphincter.

“I was crimping one off and had to get to my next class in a hurry, so I decrapitated it.”

Decrapitation is hilariously illustrated in this superlative piece of crapblogging by the inimitable Kevin Kim.

[Tip o’ th’ Elisson colander fedora to SWMBO, herownself, for this brilliant coinage.]

crappuccino [cra-poo-chee-no] (n) - 1. The vile beverage served by the minions of the Evil Mermaid; 2. The unfortunate result of an attack of loose bowels whilst wearing casual pants, [see also Cocky-Khaki].

“Holy mackerel, you shoulda seen Charlie the other day. He had an attack of the squirts right after making the turn at Gleneagles the other day - it was a real Crappuccino Moment.”

[This one - Definition 2, anyway - is SWMBO’s, too.]

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