TOOTSIES

Whenas In Jeans

Whenas in jeans my Julia crams
Her vasty hips and mammoth hams,
And zips-up all her diaphragms,

Then, then, methinks, how quaintly shows
(Vermilion-painted as the rose)
The lacquefaction of her toes.

[Parody of Robert Herrick’s “Whenas In Silks” by Paul Dehn]

Of course, She Who Must Be Obeyed has nought in common with the fictional Julia...except for those gorgeous tootsies.

Acidman would have eaten his heart out.