Welcome once again to Blog d’Elisson’s Friday Random Ten, the weekly feature in which I post a selection of Choice Cuts spewed out at random by the iPod d’Elisson.
What’s on the box? Let’s check it out:
What’s on the box? Let’s check it out:
- The Ascent of Stan - Ben Folds
- Detachable Penis - King Missile III
This gem comes our way through the kind offices of Dax Montana.
I woke up this morning with a bad hangover, and my penis was missing again. This happens all the time. It’s detachable. This comes in handy a lot of the time. I can leave it home when I think it’s going to get me in trouble, or I can rent it out when I don’t need it. But now and then I go to a party, get drunk, and the next morning I can’t for the life of me remember what I did with it. First I looked around my apartment and I couldn’t find it, so I called up the place where the party was; they hadn’t seen it either. I asked them to check the medicine cabinet ’cause for some reason, I leave it there sometimes, but not this time. So I told them if it pops up to let me know. I called a few people who were at the party, but they were no help either. I was starting to get desperate. I really don’t like being without my penis for too long. It makes me feel like less of a man and I really hate to have to sit down every time I take a leak. After a few hours of searching the house and calling everyone I could think of, I was starting to get very depressed, so I went to the Kiev and had breakfast. Then as I walked down Second Avenue toward St. Mark’s Place, where all those people sell used books and other junk on the street, I saw my penis lying on a blanket next to a broken toaster oven. Some guy was selling it. I had to buy it off him. He wanted 22 bucks, but I talked him down to 17. I took it home, washed it off, and put it back on. I was happy again. Complete. People sometimes tell me I should get it permanently attached, but I don’t know. Even though sometimes it’s a pain in the ass, I like having a detachable penis. - My Head Is My Only House Unless It Rains - Captain Beefheart
I’ll let a train be my feet
If it’s too far to walk to you
If a train don’t go there I’ll get a jet or a bus
Because I’m going to find you
You’re going to see me shadow soon around you
And my head is my only house unless it rains
I walk the meadow plains
Water deserts are my eyes until I find you
I won’t sleep until I find you
I won’t eat until I find you
My heart won’t beat until
I wrap my arms around you
My arms are just two things in the way
Until I can wrap them around you
You can make my sad song happy
Make a bad world good
I can feel you out there moving
You’re mine, I know I’ll find you
And my head is my only house until I’ve found you
I hate to have other people hear me sing this song
If this reaches you before I do
Follow it to “I love you”
That’s where I’ll find you
And my head is my only house until I find you - Noviy God (live) - Leningrad
- Birmingham - Randy Newman
Got a wife got a family
Earn my livin’ with my hand
I’m a roller in a steel mill
In downtown Birmingham
My daddy was a barber
And a most unsightly man
He was born in Tuscaloosa
But he died right here in Birmingham
CHORUS
Birmingham Birmingham
The greatest city in Alabam’
You can travel ’cross this entire land
But there’s no place like Birmingham
Got a wife named Mary
But she’s called Marie
We live in a three room house
With a pepper tree
And I work all day in the factory
That’s all right with me
Got a big black dog
And his name is Dan
Who lives in my backyard in Birmingham
He is the meanest dog in Alabam’
Get ’em Dan - I Scare Myself - Dan Hicks & His Hot Licks
- The Black Angel’s Death - The Velvet Underground
- Relax - Richard Cheese
Being a cover of the infamous song by Frankie Goes To Hollywood. - Here, There, and Everywhere - The Beatles
- Looks Like I’m Up Shit Creek Again - Tom Waits
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