Friday, September 07, 2007


Welcome once again to Blog d’Elisson’s Friday Random Ten, the weekly feature in which I post a selection of Choons drawn at random from the legendary iPod d’Elisson.

I have just returned from a deliciously fishiously breakfast, this having been the second day in a row that, thanks to the generosity of people observing yahrzeits and/or celebrating birthdays, we have had breakfast at the Local Smoked Fish and Bagel Emporium provided for us.

It is purely remarkable how one’s outlook on life may be improved by the repeated application of Nova Scotia smoked salmon, belly lox, smoked whitefish, baked salmon, sable, and herring, conjointly with scallion cream cheese and a lightly toasted Everything Bagel, to the lining of the stomach.

Appropriate to the Fishy Occasion, the little white Choon-Box has spewed out, amongst its Random Musical Selections, a Sailor’s Hornpipe...and immediately afterwards, a strange and moist tune by Ozric Tentacles. Coincidence? I think not.

Let’s just take a look at what’s on the box today:
  1. Feelin’ Alright - Traffic
  2. Keep On Growing - Derek and the Dominos
  3. Trippin’ On A Hole In A Paper Heart - Stone Temple Pilots
  4. Nokh Eyn Tantz - The Klezmer Conservatory Band
  5. Sailor’s Hornpipe and Fisher’s Hornpipe - New Bedford Harbor Sea Chanty Chorus with the Rum Soaked Crooks
  6. Sploosh! - Ozric Tentacles
  7. Chances Are - Johnny Mathis
  8. Doctor Robert - The Beatles
  9. Old Fart At Play - Captain Beefheart

    Pappy with the khaki sweatband
    Bowed goat potbellied barnyard that only he noticed
    The old fart was smart
    The old gold cloth Madonna
    Dancin’ to the fiddle ’n’ saw
    He ran down behind the knoll
    ’N’ slipped on his wooden fish-head
    The mouth worked ’n’ snapped all the bees
    Back to the bungalow

    Momma was flattenin’ lard
    With her red enamel rollin’ pin
    When the fish-head broke the window
    Rubber eye erect ’n’ precisely detailed
    Airholes from which breath should come
    Is now closely fit
    With the chatter of the old fart inside

    An assortment of observations took place
    Momma licked her lips like a cat
    Pecked the ground like a rooster
    Pivoted like a duck
    Her stockings down caught dust ’n’ doughballs
    She cracked her mouth glaze, caught one eyelash
    Rubbed her hands on her gorgeous gingham
    Her hand grasped sticky metal intricate latchwork
    Open to the room, a smell cold mixed with bologna
    Rubber bands crumpled wax paper bonnets
    Fat goose legs ’n’ special jellies
    Ignited by the warmth of the room
    The old fart smelled this through his important breather holes
    Cleverly he dialed from within
    From the outside we observed
    That the nose of the wooden mask
    Where the holes had just been a moment ago
    Was now smooth - amazingly blended - camouflaged in
    With the very intricate rainbow trout replica

    The old fart inside was now breathin’ freely
    From his perfume bottle atomizer air bulb invention

    His excited eyes from within the dark interior glazed;
    Watered in appreciation of his thoughtful preparation.

  10. Thanks For The Killer Game Of Crisco Twister - Minus The Bear
It’s Friday. What are you listening to?

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