Tired of those boring-ass Cosmopolitans? Sick to death of the Bombay Sapphire dry martini? Those fancy bleu cheese- or anchovy-stuffed olives not helping matters, bunkie?
Here’s a martini created by the master mixologists at Chez Elisson...and now it’s yours to enjoy.
It’s the Chocolate Babkatini.
First, get a nice, heavy-as-dwarf-star-matter Chocolate Babka from your nearest Jewish bakery. If you’re lucky enough to live in an area where the local Stupid-Market carries Chocolate Babka, you are doubly blessed.
Next, go to your friendly neighborhood Booze Shoppe and purchase a bottle of Chocolate Vodka. Yes, there is such a thing. In the event you cannot procure Chocolate Vodka, you can always put a squirt of white creme de cacao in with plain ol’ vodka, but it will not be the same.
Chill the vodka in your freezer until it is ice-cold and syrupy. Now you’re ready to assemble your drink.
Pour a couple of shots of the ice-cold Chocolate Vodka into a chilled martini glass. Now cut a 1-inch cube of Chocolate Babka off the loaf. Spear it with a toothpick and lob it into the drink.
Now sit back and savor, preferably while listening to some appropriate music. Klezmer works just fine.