2008: CLOSER THAN YOU THINK

Even now, Republicans are practically crapping their pants with fear over a possible Hillary Clinton candidacy...

...but there are a few credible alternatives emerging.



I can hear the Inaugural Address now:

The way your dad looked at it, this watch Administration was your birthright. He’d be damned if any of the slopes Political Opposition were gonna get their greasy yellow hands on his boy’s birthright. So he hid it in the one place he knew he could hide something: his ass. Five long years, he wore this watch Administration up his ass. Then when he died of dysentery, he gave me the watch. I hid this uncomfortable piece of metal politics up my ass for two years. Then, after seven years, I was sent home to my family. And now, little man, I give the watch Administration to you.

[The scary thing is, I think the Walken campaign is for real...]

Update: ...but of course it’s not, as astute commenter Dave points out.