As I was wand’ring in the city
I caught a glimpse of iv’ry titty
A veritable Venus.
A sight that would attract the eye
Of any reasonable guy
Who owned a working penis.
Her back was arched, her arm was raised,
Her eyes were closed (but slightly glazed)
As though in throes of pleasure.
O, if I could but take her home
(I’d need a second mortgage loan)
A sculpture for to treasure!
But I suspect the Missus would
(If she is thinking like she should)
Think this idea’s no winner.
She’d say, “If you’re so fucking rich,
Enjoy your ice-cold plaster bitch -
Get her to cook your dinner!”