RHET BUTLER

The last time I invented a Cartoon Character, it never went anywhere…but the essay I wrote about creating Super Baciagalupe was good enough to gain me entry to a major Ivy League university. Which, I suppose, goes to show you that there’s no predicting what those double-domes are looking for in an applicant.

Hey, this guy sounds like a psycho! What’s our target percentage of nutjobs in the class of ’74, anyway? Thirty-seven? Hey, he’s in.

But that was then, and this is now…which means it’s time for a new Cartoon Character, someone who can do battle on the Funny Pages against the likes of Ziggy, Dennis the Menace, and Marmaduke in the One-Panel Gag arena.

Meet Rhet – short for Rhetorical – Butler.

His speciality is asking questions to which the answer is obvious or unnecessary. Some examples:

• “Will you be wanting me to lay out your clothes, Sir, or would you prefer to traipse around the city with your Dangly Bits out?”
  
  
• “Would you like for me to clean your shoes, Sir, or would you just like to continue tracking dog excrement on the Oriental rug?”
  
  
• “Shall I pour Eric a glass of single malt Scotch?”

So: What do you think? Do you think Rhet Butler stands a chance against Ziggy?