Wednesday, March 26, 2008


I always feel like I need a hot shower after I watch even a few minutes of “Moment of Truth,” the nastiest, smarmiest, vilest, most obnoxious Reality Show since “Marry My Midget.”

The premise of the show is that contestants are asked questions in ascending order of Nosiness and Potential for Embarrassment. As you answer more questions truthfully (according to a polygraph examiner), you have the chance to win prizes of ever-increasing value. Presumably, one can win $500,000 by honestly answering incredibly personal questions such as, “When did you stop sucking your own dick?”

It says a lot about the concupiscence of the average American - or perhaps of his Lust for Fame - that people would line up for the chance to reveal Life-Shattering Truths on this show, in the process laying waste to their marriages, friendships, and family relationships for a few moments of sweaty, breathless television exposure and a crack at a few shekels.

Gawd, what assholes. Don’t they know how dangerous truth is?

Little white lies are part of the lubrication that keeps the machinery of Polite Society running. Strip away that lubrication - tell the truth about everything - and people’s lives grind to a halt.

None of us, alas, is perfect. Each one of us has a list of questions, the answers to which could conceivably make other people unhappy. But in the normal course of Human Events, we are never called upon to answer these questions...and if we are, we are allowed the face-saving expedient of the Little White Lie.

Let’s put aside the heinous premise of “Moment of Truth” aside for a moment and talk about Nuts ’n’ Bolts matters. Personally, I think the show could be improved. It tends to drag, and the producers have the nasty habit of stretching each segment out with repetitive, annoying teasers.

Me, I’d dispense with the teasers. You don’t need ’em.

Want to keep those viewers riveted? All you have to do is give the contestants’ spouses, girlfriends, or boyfriends a loaded pistol...

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