ON THE RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN JEWS AND PORCINE MAMMALS

Unlike our Abrahamic brethren who believe that pigs are so unclean, even cartoony representations of them - piggy banks, Winnie-the-Pooh Piglet dolls, and the like - are abominations against Allah, Jews get along just fine with pigs.

We’re just not supposed to eat ’em.

F’r instance, during the holiday season, Macy’s operates a kiddie ride at Lenox Mall called the Pink Pig, a beloved tradition in this town. I cannot picture a Muslim enjoying such an amusement...but we Heebs have no problem with it, since you are not expected to eat the pig. And it’s not a real pig, anyway.

Here’s a pic of the Missus, cuddling up with a stuffed toy avatar of the Pink Pig. Cute, innit?


Aren’t they sweet? SWMBO and the Pink Pig.

We have no problem using items made of pig-parts. Shoes? Footballs? Pig-bristle hairbrushes? Go right ahead. Porcine insulin? Why not? It saves lives, and our culture is a culture that values human life.

But there are limits. Some things are just plain Not Acceptable...

...this pig-shaped yarmulke, for example.


An example of an Unacceptable Yarmulke, as modeled by the Bro-in-Law d’Elisson.

Definitely not something you want to wear to Shabbat services.

“Meat - It’s what’s for headgear!”