Thursday, December 01, 2005

THE BERENSTAIN BEARS GO TO THE CEMETERY

Prolific children's book author Stan Berenstain, who, along with his wife Jan created the popular Berenstain Bears books, has died at the age of 82...a respectable age for a bear. Or a human, for that matter.
In more than 200 books, the Berenstain Bears, written and illustrated by Stan and Jan Berenstain, helped children for 40 years cope with trips to the dentist, new babies in the family, eating junk food and cleaning their messy rooms.
Now, who will help the children cope with that Cemetery Visit?

Left unfinished is a book explaining the mysterious popular association of bears with defecation. We all know bears shit in the woods, and even major Bunwad Manufacturers produce commercials showing animated cartoon bears in defecatio delicto. Alas, Stan has taken his in-depth knowledge of this weighty (fecal) matter to the grave.

The gravesite is expected to become a shrine of sorts, with offerings of honeycomb and toilet paper left by thousands of youthful mourners.

[Cross-posted at The Dead Pool.]

No comments: