THE EVOLUTION WILL NOT BE TELEVISED

But we here in Cobb County will debate about it incessantly.

From the Atlanta Journal-Constitution:

As if taking a federal judge’s ruling against them as fighting words, the Cobb County school board voted Monday to appeal a court order to remove evolution disclaimers from textbooks.

In a 5-2 vote, board members said U.S. District Judge Clarence Cooper’s decision “amounts to unnecessary judicial intrusion into local control of schools,” according to a statement they released immediately after the vote.

Well, when “local control” means the school board has been hijacked by a bunch of fuckwits right-wing religious nuts, that’s precisely the point of having judges and courts. They are there to curb the more egregious abuses of them “local controllers.”

Why these well-meaning-but-sorely-misguided folks don’t just “step away from the briefcase” and go home, I do not know. But at least it won’t cost the school district anything:

Board members said they would pursue the appeal at no additional cost, a promise stemming from board attorney Glenn Brock’s pledge to do his remaining work on the case for free. Brock's law firm has charged the board roughly $74,000 so far.

Anything but credibility among people who want to consider moving to Cobb County but who don’t want their children placed at a competitive disadvantage due to a hobbled science curriculum, that is. Thanks!

Yes, evolution is “just” a theory. Here are a few others:

Electromagnetic Theory
Theory of Relativity (Special and General)
Germ Theory

Hell, let’s get stickers for them, too.

Theory, people, means one thing in casual conversation and quite another thing to a scientist. Sure, evolution is “just” a theory - but it explains observations better than other scientifically testable theories having to do with the origin of life on Earth.

Did God create the world and everything in it? Who knows? That’s an article of faith. You can’t test it...you’ve gotta believe it. And, therefore, it ain’t science, and, therefore, our taxpayer-funded schools have no business teaching it as fact.

Belief in scientific explanations of life’s origins does not preclude a belief in God. A reasonable religious person could very well conclude that evolution is the technique God uses to effect creation. You want to be impressed with God’s handiwork? Study molecular biology! When you begin to understand the complexity of how our bodies function - how cells reproduce - how our immune systems work (just to name a few), you just might find yourself thinking that you are seeing the evidence of a Higher Power. The only people who might have a problem with that are those who believe in the literal truth of every word in the Bible. No allegory, no metaphor - just Plain. Unvarnished. Trooth!

And to such people, I have one answer. Good luck with that. Me, I believe that God (if there is one!) gave us more brains than that. One of the prayers we Jews say every morning blesses God for endowing us with wisdom and discernment. What the hell is wrong with using that wisdom and discernment?

OK, rant over. From Moron Central in Cobb County, Georgia, this is Elisson reporting. We now return you to your regular webcast.