Wednesday, October 21, 2009


*[“Freeschtick” being the Yiddish word for “breakfast.”]

Yesterday morning, as we were sitting at our usual table at the Local Bagel and Smoked Fish Emporium, three uniformed police officers walked in and sat down at an adjacent table.

This is nothing unusual. Many of Cobb County’s Finest may be seen enjoying the excellent Toroidal Provender at the Local Bagel and Smoked Fish Emporium on any given day of the week.

I couldn’t resist the impulse. I walked over to their table and, using my thumb to indicate the nearby Dunkin’ Donuts shop on the other side of the parking lot, said, “Guys, the donut place is over there. These things here are bagels. I know they look kinda like donuts, but they’re not donuts.”

That’s when they all grabbed their nightsticks. It wasn’t the pummeling that bothered me, though... it was being tasered. Twitching like one of Galvani’s frogs in front of the Minyan Boyz was not amusing. To me, anyway.

[I actually made alla this shit up. At least, the part that takes place after the cops walk in and sit down...]

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