Wednesday, November 16, 2005


Father Dominic was beginning to come unglued.

The Offertory had gone just fine. Sanctus, likewise. Lord’s Prayer, no problem.

The Agnus Dei had never sounded sweeter.

It was after Communion that things began to get sketchy. Congregants started milling around aimlessly, bumping into each other in the pews, cracking ankles on the kneelers, eyes glazed. It took three hours to herd them all out the door after “Missa est.”

By now, Dominic felt pretty strange himself. Bizarre lights flashed; weird howls echoed. Was God speaking?

Later, he found out that an altar boy had spiked the Communion wine with LSD.

[Adapted from my comment at 100 Words or Les Nessman. The theme? “Mass Confusion,” of course.]

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