Wednesday, April 08, 2009


...just how much of a Pain in the Ass an exploding can of soda can be.

It was in mid-morning, as She Who Must Be Obeyed and I were in the midst of preparations for this evening’s Seder meal, that we heard a loud “thunk” come from the refrigerator. It sounded like something falling... but what could possibly fall, in a fridge with solid glass shelves? It’s not like we had a bunch of stuff precariously balanced in there.

It didn’t take long to figure out what had happened. A can of Coke Zero had been stuck all the way in the back of the top shelf - the coldest spot in the box. Cold enough to freeze anything that sits there long enough, apparently... because the can had frozen solid and then split along the side. Bang! Chunks of frozen Coke were scattered everywhere.

The Sages tell us that if we do not clean our refrigerator thoroughly before Pesach to remove all traces of leaven, the Ribono shel Olam - Master of the World - will find a way to impel us to do it. And this was a perfectly effective method, for we had to empty everything out and wipe the entire fridge interior down. At least it wasn’t sugar-sweetened Coke, which would have left a horrible gooky residue everywhere it touched... and at least the damn can didn’t blow just as we were sitting down for our Ritual Dinner.

As for that Ritual Dinner, it promises to be exceptional. SWMBO has made a cauldron of her famous chicken soup with matzohballs: even now, it sits, simmering on the stove, tempting me to dip the ladle in and steal a bowlful. She has prepared the gefilte fish, decorating it with carrot slices and parsley sprigs. She has also made charoset, the apple and nut relish that recalls the mortar with which the Israelites built Pharaoh’s cities. The main event? A roasted veal breast, stuffed with carrot, sweet potato, and apricot tzimmes, with white grape sauce. Oooooh, I can’t wait.

Gefilte Fish - 2009 Edition
SWMBO’s three varieties of gefilte fish. People either love this stuff or hate it; for me, it has the taste of Grandma’s cooking... and home.

Oh, yes: Dessert. SWMBO has whipped up a sponge cake, and we have the pistachio-ginger macaroons I made yesterday. Hoo-hah!

To my Jewish friends and Esteemed Readers, a chag Pesach kasher v’sameach - a happy and kosher Passover. And to my non-Jewish friends and Esteemed Readers, enjoy being able to consume all the bread, cake, Scotch and beer we can’t have for eight days!

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