Friday, April 24, 2009


I can always rely on my friend Pat to seek out the Truly Bizarre in the world of food. And he does not disappoint with this link to something that looks like it came straight out of James Lileks’s Gallery of Regrettable Food.

Behold: the Crown Roast of Frankfurters!

Crown Roast of Frankfurters
Crown Roast of Frankfurters. Really.

[Scary looking, innit? All kinds of horrible images come to mind. This pic presents a good opportunity for a caption contest, but I suspect most of the entries will end up incorporating the phrase “circle jerk.” Ewwww.]

As pictured on Vermont Ferret’s Flickr site, this impressive meal is easily assembled from a pound of frankfurters (cook ’em first), 2 tablespoons cider vinegar, one teaspoon poppy seeds, 2 cups shredded cabbage, ½ cup boiling water, and an unspecified amount of pimento, along with some parsley for garnish (natch) and several toothpicks to hold the whole mess together.

The recipe comes from a 1974-vintage collection of Weight Watchers recipe cards. Ahh, the early 1970’s. It makes all too much sense. Remember, this is the decade that gave us Watergate, platform shoes, Qiana shirts open to the navel, and double-knit polyester leisure suits... so this Fine Dish fits right in.

So: Who among my brave cadre of Esteemed Readers is brave enough to assault this Matterhorn - nay, this Everest - of Quality Dining? We’ll want photos... and a full debriefing, with all details of the attendant horrors.

Update: As if the above were not bad enough, there’s also this... no doubt what’s for dinner chez Octomom. [Another tip o’ th’ fedora to Pat.]

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