THE ARISTOCRATS

Filthiest. Movie. Ever.

And quite possibly the funniest.

No nudity, nothing graphic - just Words and Descriptions of the Rudest Sort. So rude, in fact, that the entire 3,500-screen AMC chain is refusing to show it.

Not bad for a documentary.

The movie is simply a deconstruction of what some have called the most infamous joke in the world of comedy. It’s not a joke you are likely to ever see performed in any stand-up act; it’s more of a “secret handshake” among professional comedians, one that they do in each other’s company.

The joke, per se, is simplicity itself. Guy goes into a talent agent’s office, trying to plug his family’s act. He goes into a lengthy description of the act, and after he finishes, the talent agent asks him, “What do you call yourselves?”

The answer: “The Aristocrats!”

That’s it. That’s all there is...except it’s all in how you tell it.

The Family Act, you see, is whatever the comedian telling the joke wants it to be. And it is always completely obscene. Excrement, bodily fluids, violence, incest, Extreme Sex Acts of every decription - all of these are grist for the mill. As long as I’ve been walking the planet, I even learned some things I didn’t know. (Don’t ask.)

The more out-of-control and over-the-top it gets, the funnier it is.

But the movie is not simply a parade of Talking Heads telling the same joke. That would be boring. No, there’s history, there’s Detailed Analysis, there’s a real look into the workings of the Mind of the Funnyman.

And some of this stuff is sheer brilliance.

Kevin Pollak, for example, telling the joke while doing a dead-on Christopher Walken impression.

George Carlin, who delivers the most amazingly scatological version of the joke. You won’t know whether to laugh out loud or retch.

Billy the Mime “telling” the joke. Yeah, mimes usually suck...but this works.

The cast list reads like a “Who’s Who” of contemporary comedy - and every comedian brings his or her unique spin to the proceedings.

I loved it - and you might, too. But go only if you have a strong stomach. This movie is not Family Friendly (it’s unrated, but would certainly be NC-17 for language and Extreme Crudity). I suspect this Bad Boy will have a modest showing in theaters but will have killer DVD sales.

Go visit the movie’s website if you want a little taste of what to expect.

Then go see it. But don’t say I didn’t warn you.