Sunday, May 20, 2007

YO HO HO, AND A BOTTLE OF SLIVOVITZ

Back in the heyday of maritime piracy, Henkele Morgen and Schwartzburt were amongst the most feared buccaneers of all: the Jewish Pirates of the Sephardic Main.

Every morning, before beginning their day’s work of rapine and pillaging, they would darrrrhven: say their daily prayers.

They would start with P’sukei d’Zimrarrrrh, including Birkot ha-Shacharrrh, Barukh she-Amarrrrh and the Aarrrrhshrei. Then they would say the Sh’marrrrh, working up to the Amidarrrrh, the Standing Prayer. Not easy to do, that one, on the rolling deck of a pirate ship.

They would conclude with Arrrrhleinu and the Mourner’s Karrrrhdish, the latter honoring their many comrades lost at sea.

Shabbat was special. After the Musarrrrhf service, the crew would retire to the foc’s’l, where a nice Oneg luncheon would be set out. But there would never be any meat in the cholent.

Everything had to be parrrrhve.

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