Monday, May 26, 2008


I picked up a few pairs of undershorts yesterday.

Every so often, it’s a good idea to replenish the Inventory o’ Underwear. Not only is it necessary to replace old pairs that have worn out, or that have accumulated indelible Repulsive Skidmarkage, it’s nice to have as many as possible in order to stretch the interval between washloads.

I can stretch things out to about two weeks between washloads...twice that if I were, against the advice of Mr. Debonair, to double my Undershorts-Mileage by turning them inside out. Feh.

But I wanted some new shorts, and thus it was that we found ourselves at the local outpost of Kohl’s.

I’m a Briefs Guy. Specifically, a Hanes briefs guy. I know, TMI, but this Bloggity Business is all about the TMI, innit?

I’m a Briefs Guy because, as Kramer famously said, my boys need a home. It took a while to find what I was looking for, though. Lots of boxer shorts. But my boys don’t need a tent.

Lots of something they call “Boxer Briefs,” a garment that combines the worst features of boxers and briefs. My boys don’t need a prison.

[Whenever I wear boxers - or boxer briefs - I feel like I’m wearing two pairs of pants at the same time. Not a good feeling.]

After looking around a while, I finally found something that would work. Mid-rise briefs. Comfortable. My boys have a new home.

Here’s a mystery, though.

My new briefs came in a resealable package, the kind with one of those zip-lock strips. As if I were going to do something other than take them out of the plastic bag and throw the bag away.

Now: I can understand packaging, say, dried fruit in a resealable package. Trail mix. Brown sugar. That kind of stuff. Use some, then seal the package so the rest stays fresh.

But underwear? Is it going to go stale?

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